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Is it possible to fall in love with a stranger, just by asking them 36 questions? Psychologist Athur Aron and his team devised a list that could be scientifically proven to form a bond between two strangers in a laboratory setting. It’s 36 questions that could make people fall in love. Here’s a sample (the full list of questions is at the end of this post): In her story, Len Cantron doesn’t do the experiment in a lab, she does it, as many of us would on a first date, in a bar.

But imagine, if you would, the horror of asking some of the more, um, personal questions, to a man you had just met, and were um, romantically interested in:– When did you last cry in front of another person? – If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? – Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.

Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen. I want to rush home and go through it with my partner right now. But, 10 years ago, when I went on for a Saturday afternoon drink with a man I sort of knew from work, if I had pulled that out and started going through it, I would have been home by 5pm.

Being told that I was The Ringleader and being interrogated about which one of my four friends would be a better fit for a particular bachelor.

To which I had to say, “How am I supposed to know that?

I found him funny and, um, different to the guys I usually dated, we laughed quite a lot, and then I left thinking, ‘Hmmmm? I did not instantly foresee years of adventures and laughter and two little red-headed people without whom we could no longer live. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say?

Who you are right now, the things that you think define you, like your favourite dinner guest and your most-treasured possession, are transient, are not for-ever things. After checking in and getting our nametags and info sheets, we got drinks and sat down.Alicia and Liz soon joined us, and the event organizer came over to us and said, “Ladies, a word of advice, you may want to spread out. When it was time to start the speed dating, I got separated from the rest of the girls. Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s? How do you feel about your relationship with your mother? Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share … If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life. If I had done what this woman did on her first date, there would never have been a second one with the man I have now been with for 10 years. Today the Internet is talking about a beautiful essay by Mandy Len Cantron, who writes about how, on the first official date with a man she vaguely knew, she asked the 36 questions that are guaranteed to indicate exactly how compatible two people are.

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